Navigating the Decision Leave: Four Signs That It’s Time

At some point in work life, most of us reach a point where we must ask ourselves when “enough is enough.” This sentiment can arise from a variety of factors, including prolonged stress or burnout, lack of promotion or growth opportunities, or environmental factors. Deciding to leave is a significant decision that, for many, ranks alongside ending a romantic relationship.  As such, it requires careful consideration and planning. For many, we oscillate between sticking with “the devil we know” (because no place is perfect!), feeling intimidated by the prospect of starting anew and rebuilding our reputation somewhere else, and acknowledging that we’ve reached the end of our road (and, sometimes, rope) in the current role.

If you’re in a loop of questioning whether it’s time, consider these four signs that it may be time to go...

You’re in a Prolonged Funk: Consistently feeling unhappy, stressed, or unfulfilled at work can be a sign that a job is no longer a fit.  This might look like having a difficult time getting out of bed in the morning, experiencing a loss of meaning in work, or noticing a growing resentment toward some aspect of work (whether it be a person, circumstance, or the work itself). A recent client found herself oddly relieved when she had to take a 3-week medical leave from work to recover from surgery.  Her wakeup call was noticing the permission to step away from work preceded her concerns for her health. Once she fully recovered from her surgery and the burnout, she opened her job search.

Consider for yourself:

How long have you been in a funk?

What other factors may be contributing to the funk (i.e., is work really the cause)?

What do you need to recover from in order to move forward?

You’re Not Advancing or Growing: An absence of a clear path for advancement or professional development often leads to feeling stagnant.  Not to suggest one denied promotion is a sign to leave, but we should ask ourselves the following questions to determine if growth potential remains:

What are the challenges here that interest me?  Have I communicated my interest in those challenges?

What are the indicators I am valued?

To what extent have I pursued clarity regarding what it takes to advance?

For some, it is not as much about not advancing or growing, but rather the perceived injustice or unfairness in how the organization has handled communicating decisions. For one of my clients, she struggled less with being declined for a promotion (i.e., the “what”), but struggled mightily with the way it was handled (i.e., the “how”) perceiving that her manager avoided her until promotions were announced and she learned she was not promoted via email. That led to a breach in the relationship between she and the organization.

Breaches in the work relationship can eventually compound into fractures when they are not repaired. 

Indeed, the client pursued an internal lateral transfer working with a different manager who sought out her work ethic.  Though she has not been promoted, the fresh start and new challenges have been enough to keep her motivated.

The Work Environment Isn’t Working:  Workplace dynamics, including unreasonable demands, lack of flexibly, or poor management can diminish well-being.  A recent client’s attempts at establishing boundaries had failed. She spoke to HR about her concerns and was disappointed that HR “wasn’t helping.” In our conversation, I asked her what she expected HR to do and she realized that the 24/7 work environment was not something an HR Business Partner was going to change.  The realization helped her conclude that the environment was no longer a fit for her.  Similarly, I’ve worked with more than a few people who go to HR when their relationship with their manager is untenable. While HR may recommend development, poor management is not illegal.  It is rare for HR to offer a quick fix for environmental or management challenges.  It is up to us as individuals to make a change when the environment won’t.

Values Misalignment: When the company’s values and culture do not align with our own, it can lead to dissatisfaction and disconnection.  When we reach a point where our values don’t align with the organization’s, the work doesn’t just feel unfulfilling, it can feel like acting in accordance with the organizational values is at odds with our own.  The most common types of values misalignment I see include: fairness/justice, how people are treated, behaviors that are rewarded, and how success is measured.

A recent client who sat on the executive team of their organization started recognizing a dissonance with the organization’s values around social justice. They had some ideas for creating real impact.  What the organization was willing to do felt small initially and, over time, started to feel performative. The values misalignment started to seep into other things my client was noticing including perceived tokenism on the Board of Directors.  Ultimately, my client determine that the values misalignment was enough to open a query to find a role more naturally aligned with their values.

If you’re reading this, either you or someone you care about is likely considering whether it’s time to make a move. How many of these—or other—signs have you experienced?  Even when the signs are present, initiating the change is another bridge to cross.  Stay tuned to part two of this two-part series for support making the call to leave.